Monthly Archives: January 2013

It Hurts

It hurts to let you go. As a bird who wishes nothing more than to fly away, you left. Without any wish of returning nor looking back, I watch your shadow blur away… you never had any intention to stay. We are far away and left I stand. Wishing you would acknowledge the pain that is my company without you by my side.

Never did I imagine that it would be this easy. A simple word and all was changed. No matter what was, no longer is, and will not ever return. Gone. Over. And I am uncertain what hurts me most, missing you or knowing that the moment will not return.

I got confused, and I had mistaken everything for nothing. It pains me to know, and the truth is too close. I wish not to hear, nor see or feel. The truth came much too fast, much too soon, unwanted and opened my eyes. Now they tear. 

Beaten but not broken, this too shall pass. The road of happiness is a choice, often mistaken to be guided by someone else than I. Hoping to share the joy of Life. It is pure pain when you choose not to share it with me. Acceptance is the first step in mind for letting go. Not by choice but by force, because it hurts to let you go.

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Filed under Love

Change

Being in a situation where you feel uncomfortable or un-pleased makes you think about what you could do differently, change and improve what is going on in your life. Recently I found myself in a situation like this, not liking a part of my life and realized that there is no time to waste by nagging or moaning about it. After all, as I have stated some time ago;

Every day I have the power to change my life

And this statement that I keep with me, is still valid and very much true. Said and done. I am not going to suggest that it is easy, but it will be worth it. After all, I was given a very good advice by a good friend of mine, saying that if at the end of the day there is something that you don’t want in your life, makes you feel bad or uncomfortable, lose it, get rid of it or change it. Life is too short to live day in and day out knowing that there is a part of your life that makes it uncomfortable, and you unhappy. My friend is perfectly right here. If you don’t like it, change it. At the end of the day, you are in charge of your life, make sure to use that power wisely!

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Filed under Uncategorized

Memories From Life

Do you remember the happiest day of your life? Can you even recall which day that was? What happened? Where you were? Who you were with? Do you know how that day started? Or how it ended?

As I’ve had quite a lot of spare time lately, I get plenty of questions into my mind, and try to answer them, at least partially, and this is one of them.
It makes me wonder, why every day is not like the happiest day in our life? After all, we wake up to see another day. That should be enough, right?

So, regarding the happiest day of your life, did it start just as a regular whatever-day-of-the-week-it-was? Did you wake up knowing that it would be the happiest day you would experience so far?

Thinking back on that special day, how does that make you feel? Are you smiling now? Do you feel good remembering the best day in your life? Is it a good feeling running through your body remembering the day that is the best of your life so far?

Now, do you know what day was the saddest one in your life so far? What happened? Did it make you angry? Did you cry? Do you remember where you were? Who you were with?
In an instance, I am pretty sure that your entire mood change, in the blink of an eye. Yes, most probably your smile is now gone and replaced by a sad or serious face…

The power of memories, as we unlock them, they change our present time, atmosphere, feelings, they can be used for better or for worse. I find it fascinating how we can switch mood simply by remembering what happened to us in the past. We let the past determine how we feel right now, although they are memories and feelings from the past, they are still valid… Memories walk with us through life. Make sure to collect the good ones, and remember them well enough so that your smile won’t disappear.

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Filed under Every day life

Your Choice of Thoughts

Morning glory!
It’s snow and cold outside. One can hear some sweet birds twitter loud enough to wake you up, even though you’re in bed and the duvet hugs you close and keeps you warm, it is time to get up and start the day. With my first zip of coffee, I tune in a radiostation sending from far away, just to be able to listen to the language that I know by heart. As years pass by, I learn to appreciate the Power of languages, both for the heart and for the mind.

As there was less coffee in my cup, a song began to play containing a very uplifting message;

Happiness is so close, if you just want it,
With your Dreams you build your own future, your own Destiny

For some reason, this was exactly what I needed to be reminded off. In the deepest concerns of what the future will bring, after all exams, when job-hunting is on the top of lists in these days where people fight to survive, fear of losing what they have…

We might be living in difficult times, but it is the believe that we can change that will give results. In the end, it’s all a matter of mindset, at least in my world. Believing that your happiness is simply the quality of your thoughts is a very powerful tool. In fact, happiness is really a state of mind. The other morning as I woke up, for no reason really, I began to smile as I felt my happiness coming from within. The knowledge of being fortunate to have beautiful people in my life, friends and family supporting me in life, sharing laughter and tears together, holding your hand and watching your back when you go through life is the most wonderful feeling in the world.

I hope you know that the best things in life, are not things at all. You know the answer to this one, without me needing to state the obvious…

Coming back to the song which lyrics are filling up the apartment as I write this, I am sure that we all need to be reminded every now and then how powerful tools we have in our hands.
We shape our life by simply choosing one way of thinking instead of another. Keep that in mind for the day, and notice the change.  

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Filed under Encouragment, Every day life, Friendship

Any Road is Right

It’s like the weirdest feeling. I am not even sure if it can be called a feeling, more like the lack of the same. And I am not sure if I prefer not to feel compared to actually feeling. We’ve all been told to “follow our heart”, but what if you can’t understand what your heart is telling you? Or if your heart just suddenly went spontaneously mute, there is nothing coming from it, not a beat, not a tune, not a vibe. Any attempt to listen to what your heart is telling you is good for nothing, because it is not saying anything at all.  Is that what I should listen to? The silence? Or perhaps did I go selectively deaf?

The lack of information, the lack of feelings, the lack of understanding whatever my heart is telling me, or, not telling me… I am confused. Maybe I am just not ready to listen? Or maybe I just don’t want to? I can not tell what the truth is, what the situation is really like. At the same time, the head is speaking quite loudly, definitely louder than expected. As the questions arise, should one listen to the head when the heart is mute?

Do I want to follow anything? Mind or heart, regardless, it is making a decision which will lead to a change. And changes are good, right? I can not tell in this moment what I want, what I feel, or even what I want to feel. Maybe that’s where the problem begins.

When you don’t know where you are going, any road is the right one

So, perhaps that is where to start to solve the equation. Realizing and mapping out where one wants to go, where you want to be. Figuring out who says what, mind or heart… I mean, sure, it is still a part of you. But being torn apart between head and heart, is never an easy situation. As I find myself in these situations ever now and then, I get frustrated for the same reasons.
First, I cannot hear what either one of them is saying, and secondly, I am not able to decide which voice to follow. Where it usually ends up? Funny part is that it always ends up right. At the end, it is always right. It’s just the way life works. And come to think about it, I would not have it any other way.

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Filed under Encouragment, Every day life, Unknown future

Don’t be afraid

One thing I have learned by the years is to always stay true to myself, and to listen and trust what my heart tells me. In private relations with other people, I follow my heart and not a rational mind. It feels better. And it turns out to be for the best as well.

You see, I figure that if you follow your feelings, what you believe and trust, then at the end of your day you can at least be sure that one person is content, and that person is YOU!
How ever much you wish to please other people, (Go ahead, and do so!) but if you don’t really know what they want (or better yet, if they don’t know themselves what they want) there’s a slight chance that no one will be satisfied by the end of your day. I suppose that we are all in charge of our own happiness in life.

I’m not saying that I don’t have doubts. (Lord knows I do). But just as much as I doubt, I put faith into life, that it will turn out for the best regardless of how it actually will turn out. So, once every blue moon I reach out for this quote to get my mind and thoughts in order, and to get back on track.

“In the end we only regret the chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have and the decisions we waited too long to make”.

This simple line has helped me during several difficult moments in life. When I was scared, frightened, unsure and simply afraid of the decision I was about to make, figuring, I could either stare at the issue or problem, hoping that it would go away, or I could actually do something. Take action for my own happiness, for my own life.
I’ve done a couple of those decisions recently, and even though I’m still not sure what the final outcome of that will be, at least I followed my heart. And truthfully speaking, is that not what it’s really about? To follow your own heart? In every aspect really.

Not sure how you feel about trusting your intuition or heart, but I do trust mine. I made a decision that I am going to trust my self, my own opinion and my own feelings. After all, why would I want anything else but my own best? Sure, if it doesn’t work out, I will simply have to make a new decision. But always following ones heart is a good rule of thumb.

As for the quote above, I really do believe that it is the way life goes. We do not regret the chances we took, but the ones that we let go and didn’t take. We regret all the moments of happiness we could create with another person because we were afraid and scared to take that next step together. And finally, we regret taking too much time thinking back and forth regarding a decision that should have been taken much earlier. We regret that time was spent on thinking instead of doing.

Reading this quote every now and then, when needed, reminds me of how I want to live my life. What I wish and don’t wish to regret in life. Maybe it is impossible to live a life without any regrets, or maybe it is simply a choice.

Regardless of how life turns out, sometime we need a little bit of encouragement in order to move, in one direction or another. Just like riding a bike, you need to actually move in some, any, direction, to make it work.

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Filed under Encouragment, Love, Unknown future

Second time counts?

What makes you regret more, the things you have done, or the things you never did?

They say that the things you don’t do, are the things you regret the most…
Going “what if” about past opportunities is really uncomfortable. Then again, at some point it was a choice, even if the lack of decision was the outcome, it was an active choice not to make a decision, right? (I hope you’re following my monologue here)

I try to live my life without regrets. I mean, after all, everything I have been through in life has lead me to become the person I am today. And frankly speaking, I like myself. However, this is not about decisions that affect me personality-wise, but rather life-wise. See, when you make a decision, it could be life-changing for you, and those are really difficult to make sometimes.

Looking back now, I might have a few of those behind me in my past. Like a crossroad where I needed to decide which way to go, and so I chose one and went in that direction I decided was the right one for me.
Check and done, you don’t go back.

But… (so, here it comes, right?) what if you were able to go back? What if that door has not been completely closed yet? Or it re-opened and you just found out. Even if you already accepted that “missed” opportunity from before, if you realized that you made the wrong turn earlier, but since life goes on, so did you…
Now, let’s say that life plays some tricks on you, and suddenly you are back to where you were, a little different, a bit older, the situation is not quite the same, but still you are at a point where you have to make a decision, about the same things more or less. How do you deal with the same decision? Would you think differently? Would you be ready to make a different decision this time?

Does everyone deserve a second chance?

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Filed under Encouragment, Unknown future